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We just need 39 more days. Please, think positive thoughts/pray, whatever you can do to will our babies to stay in for another 39 days. In 39 day, the babies will be at 28 weeks. This is 12 weeks early, but they would have very great chances to not have any long lasting problems. They would end up in the NICU, but they would end up being fine.

This morning Hava was feeling a bit different than normal and decided to call the OB. A few hours later, she got a call back from the doctors office and it was decided that she should be checked out. We met at the doctors office at the appointed time and were escorted to an exam room shortly thereafter. Since today’s exam was just to make sure that everything looked ok, a nurse practioner was doing the work. She proceeded to tell us about her boy/girl twins and the difficulties that they had. She had no luck hearing the heart beats with the doppler, so it was onto the ultrasound again! Everything was perfect – two perfect tiny heart beats, heads together, hands and feet moving around (our babies are ALREADY hyper).

Then she performed the exam. She immediately said “I think you are dilated 2 cm.” and then ran to get a doctor to confirm. Well, the doctor came in, confirmed, and, about 15 minutes later, we were in a room at the hospital. ER’s should be that efficient. The wait for the perinatologist was longer than we were hoping for, but not too bad. He did his exam and sounded very positive. He has this calming effect on me. He is absolutely low key and acted as if 2 cm dilated at 22 weeks isn’t that big of a deal and proceeded to suggest that Hava get a cerclage, which is a few stitches that close the cervix. So, they came in to get Hava ready for surgery at about 5:50 this afternoon (October 12, 2007). A emergency c-section took precedence over her, which put the surgery on hold for about an hour. No big deal, just wait for a while longer. They finally came in to wheel her away for surgery – I gave her and the babies a kiss and off she went. The doctor came back a little bit later – maybe 45 minutes. I think it was a few minutes after 8:00 p.m. by this point. He looked serious. I hung up the phone and he told me the bad news – Loen’s amniotic sac ruptured during the surgery. He says that Hava had a very large contraction during the procedure and the sac just popped. This is a HUGE deal. He told us that there were two options: 1) terminate the pregnancy 2) strict bedrest and antibiotics and hope for the best. The survival statistics that he gave us are grim. I just can’t describe the emotions that I felt.

I wish that I could trade spots with the twins – I’d do it in a second.

I get really upset when I think about my baby girls safe & healthy environment collapsing around her.

I am currently trying to will away any negative thoughts, but it is not working too well. I can hear a baby crying down the hall and begin to weep thinking about the possibility that my babies won’t get to do that. If something happens, how will we ever be able to look at another baby with absolute joy and excitement that we currently have?

This pregnancy is something that both Hava and I were very prepared for. It took a long time for it to happen, but it did. Then it got better – twins. Then it got even better – a boy AND a girl!

Now we might not get either.